Thoughts On Consuming News
Here’s the comment I posted on Chuck Wendig’s blog. The site is called Terrible Minds. The post is “A Small But Vital Thing, Taken.” I felt like I could have written so much more, but left it relatively short. Definitely go read it if you haven’t already. He is a brilliant writer and is the inspiration for this blog!
Anyway, here was/is my comment:
I fight this all the time too. How much information is enough to get a feel for what is going on while keeping my anxiety low? For me, a lot of good memories came from watching CBS news at 10PM on my 15″ TV in my room wearing wireless headphones (this was before Bluetooth, so I felt so cool.)
I went to school for Mass Communications where I kept reading and watching news not only for fun, but considered a career as a journalist, watching and reading All the President’s Men, groundbreaking journalism, and others feeding me that information we all rely on from town council meetings to wars and other agendas. I realized I didn’t like the stop-and-go hours (even though I enjoyed the writing, meeting new people and engaging in different perspectives.)
I was and still might be the type that reads the NYTimes for fun (according to the guy working at the bookstore at the time in 2013, I was the ONLY one picking it up even though they were free and provided.) I’ve strongly considered just reading the paper, dedicating only that time to freak out about and digest the news.
By 2015, my diet changed, and I think it’s because the news changed. One time, I bought a paper before the 2016 election and flipped to the political section where a giant face made me jump. Trump’s face took up most of the spread which in terms of space was expensive. Part of me thought they are just playing up the possibility of this man getting elected, but then it actually happened.
Image taken January 2016. I misremembered that it was 2015, but that’s a better track record compared to see above.
The facts that used to be in the news became more hypotheticals and with hypotheticals came the dread and anxiety. And then when some of those hypotheticals became facts, I was already so full on anxiety, I couldn’t stomach any more. I loved seeing how the sausage was made and I forgot that with these sausages, there sure a lot of a-holes (bad people and bad things they cause or oversee that I can’t immediately change.)
Now, I feel like a guest who was invited if not forced by hunger back to eat some more, but I’ve learned to take a sample platter and leave the rest. I read Morning Brew most mornings after my morning pages and writing, watch YouTube shorts, and keep tabs on headlines on Google news. I also watch the late night breakdowns of news stories. (Might as well try to laugh and know I’m not alone in feeling this despair.)
Aside from voting, donating, and volunteering. I wish I could do more, but there’s so much out of my control (my dad’s cancer, my cat’s probable cancer, and corrupt politicians and what they do). I don’t want to let anxiety win and prevent me from living my life, from smelling the roses on my way to work. I was an anxious kid who thought Planet X was going to destroy us all (2002 internet. What a time! I was 11?) But the day came and went, and I somehow didn’t have a nervous breakdown that day. I couldn’t destroy it even if I wanted to, so I felt a strange zen on that day and when I checked the site, they moved the date, so I said to hell with that and learned to be careful of what I read.
This news cycle, it’s like multiple marathons back to back, but we have to try to keep going, giving ourselves breaks in the process and supporting our fellow runners (I don’t think I could run a physical marathon…but I love the metaphor.) Worrying more won’t let us finish faster, and we can walk all we want. (Are there marathons where you have to only run where they disqualify you if you let up even a bit? I’m not aware, but that would be cruel.)
I’m about done rambling. Just know you’re not alone. Writing is an escape for me. I compartmentalize by necessity. Even if I’m freaking out the other 23 hours of the day, for that hour when I’m writing before work, I tell myself that I’m going to try my best and not destroy myself in the process (Thanks, Chuck! I’ve read your Gentle Writing Advice maybe 3 times?) And the new age gestapo will have to rip my laptop and notebooks from my cold dead hands before I give that up, and even then, I could probably haunt a computer and become a literal ghost writer, right? Right?